Wednesday, June 24, 2009

A is for authoritarian

"God's laws are designed to protect people from themselves."

So says Mark Sanford (R) South Carolina, big red (A) in public. Yea, yea, another conservative hypocrite. Family values southern guy ditches his wife and kid for an affair with an exotic foreigner. Not such a hillbilly after all, eh? Yea, yea, I know, the term "hypocrite" in "conservative hypocrite" is redundant. We all know that.

I find the above quote from the governor much more interesting than his all-too-human fuckfest with a dusky temptress from a foreign land. Let he who hasn't either done that or fantasized about it cast the first stone. What separates conservatives and normal people on the scarlet letter question is the idea of control. I think we can all agree it's not a great thing to fuck around on your wife and mother of four kids and get busted all over the news cycle. The difference is that normal people think a person should exercise self-control in these matters while conservatives think government should intervene to smack down sexuality. Why? Because God commands that we do whatever it takes to keep people from enjoying sex. Sanford's little speech lays it out plain.

My knee-jerk reaction is to think that these hypocritical authoritarian fucks don't believe a word of their purported religion. Anyone who believes in an afterlife; anyone who believes that quality of a guy's eternal afterlife is decided by his ability to keep his dick in his pants would manage to keep his dick in his pants. Personally, I'd cut the damned thing off if it would guarantee me eternal bliss. Any sane person would.

Yea, yea, I know that the conservative pathology is more complicated than that, but they definitely believe in earthly authority, no ifs ands or buts. In the societies conservatives rule, societies such as Iran, Saudi Arabia, Afghanistan, North Korea, et. al., the government beats the bitches in the street for any hint of sexuality. That's the ideal conservative society. That's what conservatives, people like Mark Sanford, need to control their hard on. They need for government to keep the bitches from tempting them. They need for the government to punish the ones who do. And God agrees, you can read it in a holy book, so it makes a lot of sense to people who believe that crap. That's why the conservatives of this world, Mark Sanford being today's poster boy, so diligently pursue state power. They can't control themselves so they want somebody else to do it for them. And when they're caught, they'll ask for and receive forgiveness, but you can bet they never gave any and probably never will.